Almost Time

When we first embarked on this adventure with Cy, I never thought it would be difficult to share our journey… even in the best of times.

Looking back on everything we’ve done, it’s still hard to celebrate the smallest moments let alone write about the big accomplishments and rough times. Instead, I let myself get lost in those moments sharing them with only Cy, giving him the love that I promised him when he shook my hand that very first time. And when I needed to escape my emotions, I dove into the science of his disease, often searching for cures that I know don’t exist.

Lost in the moments, we unknowingly completed our mission to do 100 new things with Cy. While I know looking back, I’ll find comfort in all the adventures, big and small, right now it just doesn’t feel like enough.

In the quietest hours of the day, when my mind is left to its own devices, I either find peace in the time we’ve shared or silent desperation praying to a God I don’t know, passed loved ones and even late family pets.

Cy, ever so resilient, our gentle prince, gives up his own pain to comfort mine. As his health declines, his love grows and I know the day is coming soon when I have to give up my happiness to comfort his pain.

Love can be so beautiful yet so cruel.